My friend/main-gay Sam Hodge, who of late may or may not have been hibernating in a lubed up hot ass hell rabbit hole is slowly emerging as a diamond dusted butterfly for the pleasure of many.
This includes me, I've missed my main.
Every girl has a main.... I have a gaggle (of gays) and a main, which is a lucky circumstance that not many are blessed with. Maybe only Cher, Dolly Parton and me.
Walking down streets together hand in hand, we used to receive glares from unhappy other boy girl couples jealous of our love, doing things that would envy them on purpose. Posing as a couple matching hoodies, sectioned paper, sitting in the sun on a sunday late morning at Kawa.
It was perfect, I helped him through his slut spiral he deflected all unwanted attention I got.
Lets take a walk down memory lane:
This was Tsunami boxing day, amazingly the night Ryan 'fuck face' Lobo through mince pies at Mel's wall and told me I was "too fat to wear yellow".
My mum bought me an indian wedding sari for christmas, thanks mum. Wedlock never looked so gay!
A favorite past-time: Practicing hollywood pouts and smiles. Flashy!
Same then won big on the pokies, thats how he got the name 'New Money'. You go chinnita!
Pioneer studios, we were doing a shoot or something but i accidently got really drunk. That always happens to me, asians just shouldn't drink.
I've often asked Sam about the first time we met, it was when i was 18 and was walking to the post office to post some jeans and shit but on purpose walking the long way on Crown st.
He was hanging out with Jristian and Mel. It was summer time and everyone was hanging out at middle bar and Oyster Magazine was still cool when Charlotte was the editor. Sydney wasn't as slutty then.
This was around the time I was obsessed with role playing and would give us both characters for the night to hang out as. This one was me playing a post war widow who was still kinda hot, and Sam was someone but i cant remember but his outfit didnt work.
Many photos were taken over the winter at the cricketers, we got fat together and then lost it.
CIARA CIARA CIARA..... 'Goodies' was our anthem for 2 months then i gave it up for 'Oh'.
Sam's the most amazing main a girl could have. We have ploughed through twin break ups, suicide attempts, eating disorders, crying fits of laughter, Jemima Khan's horrible wild life shows, more dumplings and beers imaginable, 4 million cigarettes, $598 worth of phone calls, 19 bottles of gin, ups and downs in fashion moments, more heart breaks than a muted widow, frequent quests fitness, Sams sausage stew, 87628632017312 text messages and countless 'I love you, you dont need him's'.
So after that blast from the past, and the warming of our hearts.
Sam is having an exhibition for his beautiful photographs..... Please come and buy them all so he can take me to Tahiti for cocktails in coconuts on the beach with umbrella's!
S is for SLUT
A is for ADORABLE
M is for MENTOR
U is for UNRELENTING
E is for EASY
L is for LONELY
H is for HOT
O is for OBIVIOUS
D is for DARLING
G is for GANG RAPE
E is for EVERYTHING MY EVERYTHING.